This is part bio, part letter to YOU - the you that is out there dating, has dated, will date in the future or knows someone who will. 

Never did I think that I’d still be at this. And by this, I mean trying to help shape dating culture; making it more human, fun and less crappy however I can. 

I first waded into the dating waters back in 2009. But I wasn’t just focused on my experience. I was watching how it was changing others. It seemed like yes, there were going to be some success stories due to sheer volume, but things were changing at a clip - and nobody was talking about the downsides - about how it would change and rewire us and the journey towards finding a romantic connection for, well everyone. 

So I did what any bartender-turned-brand strategist would do: I poured myself a seltzer, grabbed a sharpie, several big 3M sticky notes and listened like my livelihood depended on it. And in the same way a good bartender pays equal attention to drinks and vibe, I knew a new cultural cocktail was taking over.

I began by mapping out the relationship timelines of couples I knew that met offline. The progression of how they met, formed feelings and built their relationships was often the OPPOSITE of how online dating was built as a way to find a partner. This didn’t mean that online relationships were not solid or that dating apps shouldn’t exist. 

It just meant that the timeline and sequence of how many relationships form was at risk of being wiped out - yea, like an endangered species.

And again, nobody seemed to be talking about it this way. People were fatigued and disoriented but tended to only blame themselves or other people - rarely thinking about how the dating eco-system itself was being injected with algorithms, design choices and business goals at scale. It was a recipe with major implications.

I started experimenting with creative tactics and event formats to see if I could slow down and infuse different elements into the process of dating - go organic, artisan, small-batch, if you will, - and try to offset some of the symptoms I was seeing in people who were dating via the apps and online. I was discovering new, old and different ways that environment and stimulus could change the trajectory of how people could learn about each other and how they would ultimately interact. That early research and experimenting led me to start multiple in-person event formats, including one called Me So Far. 

I would go on to work for the dating industry thinking I could affect things from the inside. When that didn’t quite work out, my career took both a logical and unexpected twist. I was invited to bring my expertise in dating to rethink workplace relationships which were also in much need of attention and reimagination. I joined WeWork in 2018 to start their Workplace Connection practice. Despite the “crash” part it was one of my most fulfilling career chapters. 

And now I’ve returned to the thing I care about the most and want to help reimagine again: how we meet, form and think about our romantic futures. 

There is NOTHING that lights me up more than this topic. Though, if you want to see me get fired up, just use the words “meet” and “connect” interchangeably:) 

I believe we are at an important inflection point in the history of love, romance and connection but I also think we can do it with humor and heart. 

Y’all (that’s the part of me that still loves Dallas) - dating is not just something single people do. Dating is simply the process of getting to know other people. It’s not only about our romantic futures but relationships at large. 

And I believe that an unsuspecting ally in this societal quest to rethink connection might just be you, the Later Dater - yes you. The person who, among other things, knows what “please be kind and rewind” means:)

Your dual upbringing between the analog and digital, might be just the thing that can change the climate of dating today.

If you’ve read this far, I think you’re swell and I appreciate you.

Welcome To The Later Dater Today.
You’re Not Late, You’re Right On Time.

-Lakshmi